Updated: Jun 15
When I heard the phrase self-care, I used to think it was the stereotypical spa day or massage treatment. For me, that wasn't something I could see myself doing every week. It wasn't until recently that the narrative changed. Life was rough and I wasn't in the best place mentally, but I refused to stay in that mind space. I always brushed aside the idea of going out alone because I thought it would be embarrassing. Well let me tell you, it was and is the best thing I've ever done for myself!
You get to do things you always wanted to do!
Sometimes, you'll have friends that don't match all of your interests. I had some friends that weren't as passionate about food as I am, therefore going to certain restaurants wasn't as exciting for them and sometimes, it killed the mood. But by pleasing a group, you lose yourself and I didn't fulfill that part of me that craved to wine and dine. When I go out by myself now, I have a blast. I get to indulge in the things that make me happy and no one else can affect my experience.
You don't have to worry about plans getting canceled.
When we plan trips or outings, we tend to think of the people we'll be able to enjoy it with. But what happens if those plans change and they can't come? Usually, we take our shoes off and call it a night but wasn't it something that you really wanted to do? If you plan with you in mind first, it doesn't matter who cancels on you, you go regardless.
It can improve your mental health, it did for me.
Now I'm not a therapist and everyone is different so I can only speak on my experience. I used to have a bad case of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). I would really think that I wasn't fun to be around and truth be told, I still feel that way sometimes. But what I now realize is that I'm not for everyone and when my energy isn't reciprocated, I may not be as fun to be around. But that says more about who I'm with than what it says about me.
It can help gain confidence! (cue hair flip)
When you go out by yourself, you dress however you see fit for the occasion. There's no wondering if you're over or underdressed or comparing your outfit or body to the people you're with. Living your best boujee life starts with you. So put on that bomb outfit that's been sitting in the closet and hit the streets cause the world is waiting my love!
It counteracts the loneliness.
It really is a change of mindset. If I'm feeling lonely, I don't go looking for other people to fill that void, I find it for myself. I could either sit at home and wallow in my loneliness, or I could up and go experience life. Feelings are fleeting but experiences make lasting memories. This life waits for no one and neither should you.
You truly get to learn yourself and how you want to be treated
I know the thought of sitting alone with your feelings and thoughts can be daunting but it's the only way we can process ourselves. Now I'm not saying we should self-diagnose but analyze our habits. Learn what makes you happy, sad, frustrated, exhilarated and you'll know what you need. Remember this: we show people how to treat us.
Well friend, I hope this helps you to continue walking in your power! Let me know what you do on your self-care days. Until next time love!
Boujee isn't a choice, it's a lifestyle (and a mindset).
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